Welcome to Weight Loss for CEOs. A podcast that teaches executives and leaders how to deal with the unique challenges of achieving sustainable weight loss while balancing the responsibility of a growing company, family, and their own health. Here’s your host, executive coach, Diana Murphy.
Oh, it feels so great to be with you today. I am so pumped up about what I’m bringing you today on the podcast. I had a fabulous morning and met a new very young entrepreneur. And the speaker was just one of those people that, you knew that with every success he had that he gave back. It was really exciting. Those were just some of the things that really light me up, so I’m a little bit on fire today about what I’m going to bring you.
And I want you to just carefully listen and remember as I’m sharing these concepts with you to stay curious. Alright, without any more preface, I have people ask me all of the time, how do I stay motivated in taking care of myself? How do I stay focused on eating well and working out when I have so much going on and I have so much work to do in my business?
And it’s stressful, I have so many responsibilities. You know, the people I work with are CEOs, entrepreneurs, leaders, and their plates are really full. But when it comes to results around wellness, the difference between full commitment and trying is everything and getting to the bottom of really which mindset you’re operating from is key, and I’m going to help you with that today.
It boils down to this; there are plenty of things in your life that you are 100% committed to and are getting amazing results. Your business is growing, the ideas are flowing. You’re seeing results that you just dreamt of years ago. But your health is suffering. You know, it’s different for everyone I meet and all of the people I work with, but it could be that you’re experiencing a lot of stress and you know that the actions you’re taking to feel better are not working, or you’re not getting enough rest, or you’re just giving up putting any energy towards food prep or exercise or anything in that realm.
But there really is good news. You can stop trying. No, I mean it, stop trying to take care of your health. Your health is not a side-hustle. It is your main hustle so that you can do all that you want to in your life. Think about anything that you want to accomplish or have done in the past, anything that’s important to you that you’re working on, even right now.
I would bet that you’re 100% committed, fully committed. In your business, you might have set big goals this year, like I have, and that’s all you’re thinking about and you’re taking a lot of action there, or you’re a new parent and you’re all in on learning to be the best mom or dad, you’re newly married and you wouldn’t think of not being fully committed at this point in your relationship. You’re not trying; you’re fully committed, 100%.
There is a big difference, and when we are a busy CEO or leader, we choose where to put that energy every single day. But what I think is really tricky is we think that we just can’t do any more, especially when it comes to wellness sometimes. We just feel like we have too much on our plate.
So what I’m talking about here is not about doing more, although you might, but thinking more; making a decision that creates the energy and mindset that actually makes it more effortless. I’m all in on effortless. Are you?
So think about your health; how committed are you? This could be weight loss. This could be getting stronger. This could be getting healthy, losing a certain amount of weight, family life balance, where you really want to be spending more time at home but you’re not making that a consistent lifestyle. I encourage you to get very specific. What do you really want here? Name it.
I want to lose 15 pounds or 30 pounds, very specific. I want to get strong enough to hike eight miles is another idea. I want to spend quality time with my family, define what that is. I want to reduce the stress I’m experiencing. I want my lab results, you know, to be better around diabetes or high blood pressure. You’re kind of on alert and you want those to be better but it just feels like too much.
But pick that goal, very specific, something for you that is wellness-focused right now and it could even be mindset. For me this year it was committing to 100% believing in my business and what I was dreaming. So, now it’s time for you to make a decision, one that’s going to make all the difference.
You can try or you can be 100% all in. There really aren’t any other options. Both of these choices create results for sure, but which one creates the result you most want? And these aren’t trick questions. And I know the first time I was coached and asked, like, how committed are you and I’m like, I’m raising both hands and I’m, like, all in. But it wasn’t done with the method I’m going to share with you today, by understanding what gets in the way of our full commitment.
My life is changing in dramatic terms by understanding the power of full commitment and what I can do along the way. To illustrate this point and to help explain why I love using weight loss as an example, because I do love using weight loss as an example because this is Weight Loss for CEOs, but also, it’s such a powerful one for illustration.
When someone is 100% committed to losing weight, it takes away a lot of ambiguity on what to do, right? If you’re committed fully to losing weight and to whatever goal you’ve set, all of the decisions and strategies along the way point to one thing; losing weight. It affects how you move, shop, workout, cook, order at restaurants, et cetera.
But it doesn’t mean that there aren’t challenges along the way, but if a person wants to lose weight and they are 100% committed, they will solve these struggles along the way and now be deterred. That’s what I mean by being fully committed. If you’re all in then you don’t back off when you hit a challenge. Nope, you now work to solve it because you are committed.
Now, I don’t think this concept makes much sense unless you look at the alternative. Remember, there are just two choices when you set a new goal. You can try, or you can be 100% committed no matter what. Again, you have two choices; you can try to hit a goal or you can be fully committed no matter what.
Because what if you were just trying to lose weight? When you’re trying to lose weight, you’ll get started, you buy healthy food, you look up the nutritional data when you dine out, you’ll sign up at the gym, but when it doesn’t come so easily because of, let’s say, life, you pull back on putting any more energy into it until you can try again.
I think the key difference in trying to lose weight versus 100% commitment is what happens when you fail. If you are trying and you fail, you gain weight where you didn’t expect or you don’t take any action towards healthy results, you think in your mind that you can’t do it. Your brain convinces you that the circumstances are way too hard and you give up.
You tried, you gave it a good shot, and well, it wasn’t for you this time. I know this has happened to me my whole life. But if you are 100% committed and fail, you are just as disappointed when you don’t see results. There’s no difference. Or when you have a setback, you’re discouraged, but if you’re in it no matter what after that setback, that discouragement, that failure, you dust yourself off and you restrategize and you try again.
This is when you stop and pivot and try again. I do think there is a big how in how to create this full commitment, this 100% committed no matter what. And it takes some understanding of why my method or what I’m going to share with you today as 100% mindset works so well.
When you are fully committed, you put your brain to work on focusing on the solution. When you are trying, you are giving your mind an opportunity to look for where it won’t work instead of where it will. My friends, this is the magic. This is what I’m living right now. When you try again, your brain looks for the cracks. It looks for where it’s hard. It gives up easily.
When you’re fully committed, you give your brain an opportunity to create the solution because you have, my friends, plenty of brainpower, plenty of willpower, and genius thinking to solve the wellness issue in your life. You absolutely do.
But your brain has been convincing you that you don’t have time, or it’s just not possible. It’s that trying mindset. I’m here to tell you, you can do anything you set your mind to. It’s absolutely true. Your mind is your strongest weight loss and habit-changing tool. Your mind has the ability to create any result you want.
Now, again, remember what you most want. Claim it right here and let me show you how to stay fully committed until you hit that goal. First, you’re going to need to be brave. I’ll explain in a minute. Next, you’re going to have to become more of a watcher to any of that unintentional thinking. Last, you’re going to have to drop judgment and expectations on what it should look like.
You know, in my coaching, I am the queen of asking my clients to look at everything with curiosity and compassion. You’re going to need to do that if you want to stay fully committed. The entire journey of hitting a goal that is new for you, that you’re 100% committed to is a journey by following these steps along the way. And I literally promise you’ll hit your goal if you use this method.
First, it will take some bravery to set a new goal and to be fully committed, especially if it’s not something you’ve ever done before. Like for me, it was setting goals in my business and I had no idea what was even possible, but I just started dreaming. But I got stuck along the way. You’ll hear about that in a minute.
When you say it aloud, that goal, even to yourself, it’s going to bring up a lot of thoughts and concerns. Your brain loves to protect you and it’s just trying to protect you from the unknown and from disappointment too. But when we realize this, we can move forward. This was clearly illustrated for me by my brilliant coach Brooke Castillo. I was on a call with her being coached on my results in my previous business year and I was setting off to really make it happen. I was fully committed.
I loved my clients. I loved what I was currently doing. I loved creating my podcast, but I was not seeing the growth I had expected from all my hard work of the previous year. And Brooke asked me a really important question. She asked me what my current go-to emotion was creating my business, creating results. And I said confident, and I kind of pushed my chest up and – I wish this was video right now – I felt really good. Almost like superwoman but not quite because confidence was not working for me.
And she just calmly said, “Diana, I think you might need another emotion to work on. I think you might need courage.” I immediately resonated with that and she asked me another question; what would you be doing if failure wasn’t even possible? What would you be doing for your podcast, for you clients, for your business, the way you reach out, the way you write, the way that you show up, the type of events you go to, the things you create? What would you do if failure wasn’t an option?
All of a sudden, my brain was thinking of a bazillion ideas. Courage was my go-to emotion. It took being brave to really stay on track with my full commitment towards my big goals. The energy is so different, and dropping into courage and asking myself all the time, if failure wasn’t an option, what would I do? If it was just not possible to fail, what would I do?
Now, for me, this straight-A follow the rules person was plenty confident, but I was not stepping over the threshold and really believing in my future. And since then, I have taken some very brave steps in my business. My podcast is one of them. I rebranded it. I went all in. I’m not recording them faster and I set a goal to double my podcasts. I did. I’m going to share more on that goal later because there’s another facet of this that really played into that.
But I doubled my podcast downloads, I’m coaching clients that if I had not taken some brave steps with them, they would not have gotten the results that they’re looking for. And if I had not been brave, I don’t think I’d be meeting some of the amazing entrepreneurs that I’m meeting now. Because, I don’t know if you realize, if you’re an entrepreneur, you’re pretty brave already. This is just using all that courageous energy around your wellness.
Alright, another facet that really gets in our way are those obstacles, the person that tries finds those obstacles. I want to help you turn into the person that is fully committed and breezes through the obstacles. They will happen. First, expect the obstacles.
Alright, there are so many things that come up that seem like reasons that we can’t hit a goal. I travel, so I can’t workout, or I have a special diet that’s way too hard to follow, I’ll never be able to lose weight. Those are just some examples. Those are thoughts that are coming up because you are creating a new belief, a new goal, that you’re a person that’s going to lose 30 pounds, for example.
This is the area where the grit and grind of full commitment is met. It’s like where the rubber meets the road. This is where you bravely look at those thoughts, those unintentional reasons that you can’t hit the goal. Remember, when you’re in trying mindset, those will be the reasons you pull back or say it didn’t work this week.
But if you are fully committed, you create an awareness of those unintentional, what I call obstacle thoughts, so that you can keep moving forward. Unintentional thinking does feel like the reasons you can’t hit a goal, but they are just thoughts in your mind. Those reasons create unintentional results. Unintentional thoughts create unintended results.
These unintentional thoughts are wearing you out because, in effect, your brain is telling you you can’t do it. And your brain is saying that around what you most want to do. This is when it’s really, really uncomfortable. The best way, and for me, as a new business owner, you’ll classically hear of you talk to new business owners, they really, really believe or want these big goals, but there is a part of their brain telling them that they’re not good enough, that they’re imposters, like who are you to start coaching or start a new idea or new business?
It is just fascinating and it really wears us out because it’s like our brain is telling us that they’re busting our dream. But the brain loves to protect you from failure. It’s not helpful. So the best way to bust this is to learn to ask some new questions. Do ask, why didn’t I achieve my goal this week?
Be brave enough to ask this question. Ask it a lot, why didn’t I achieve this goal? If I wanted five new clients this year in my business in the type of framework that you’re in, why did I not achieve that, or why do I not have a new client yet? For a new business owner setting a really big revenue goal, looking at those number often and asking, why didn’t I achieve this goal? And then around wellness, why am I not losing weight? Why am I not getting to the gym? Why am I not sleeping enough?
Ask those hard questions because it will give you information. Remember, stay curious and compassionate in this space. If you ask those questions, you can make a list of all the reasons. They will give you the reasons why you’re not hitting your goal.
They will feel true. They will feel like reporting the news. But if you are fully committed, you can now look at those reasons and create a strategy to overcome those objections. Your brain is just offering you, I don’t have time, so you ask, when do I have time? I travel too much, there’s no way I can take good care of myself, and the question you can interrupt to just solve that issue, how can I plan for travel? How can I do this? What’s a quick way I can do this? What’s an easy way I can do this? These are great self-coaching questions to help you break that pattern.
Unintentional thoughts are just an old pattern. Asking questions disrupts the pattern and helps you to solve the obstacle to your goal and to keep moving with all that great energy of full commitment. Again, when you’re fully committed, the brain is ready to help you to stop, assess, and solve the issue. But if you’re trying, that reason ill stop you and it will block your insight.
When we are in trying mindset, it blocks the access to your wisdom. It creates a block. Full commitment looks for a solution, it looks for your inner wisdom to solve it.
I love when I’m coaching someone around weight loss to just ask, what would a person who’s already lost the weight do? What would a person that was already running this type of company do? Put your dreams to work. They will help you know the how and know what to do next, to jump right over that obstacle.
And this kind of slides right into the next part; drop your expectations of what it should look like. Our brain loves how, and if it doesn’t know how, it thinks it can’t. It can’t see it. But you are so much smarter than your brain’s default mode. That’s default mode.
We all create life on default. It’s a way that we’re efficient with the things that we’re doing in our life. But you want to do – I know you, you want to do life more on purpose and this is the way to do it. But the only way to do it is to create it intentionally by honoring that goal and stepping into the unknown with the goal in your hand and moving forward no matter what and not caring how long it takes.
Again, it’s that brave step into not really needing to know the how to keep taking action, but also not caring how long it takes. This is building that mindset of 100% belief in your goal. It’s all about taking action until you hit the goal. When we begin expecting results to happen in a particular timeframe or a framework, like we think it’s going to happen this way, we have brought a lot of judgment into the picture. From my own personal experience, this is not helpful.
As a very new business owner, a few years ago, I really expected big results in my business. I had never run a business before. That’s why I do call myself an entrepreneur. I was expecting things that people that had three years of experience where having.
Now, I’m all about big goals, but I was being really hard on myself around not hitting what I thought should happen by now. It prevented me from seeing what was working and it put me into the trying mode. I was in trying mindset. And the judgment really got in the way.
I would stop taking action completely and sit in my discouragement. I was just believing I couldn’t do it. My brain was trying to protect me from failure and it actually created it instead. Again, our expectations are just thoughts that it should take a certain period of time or we think we know how we’re going to get the final result, but those judgments along the way just really disrupts our brain’s ability to solve problems and to create your new results along the way.
Your brain is your best tool at creating your business and great results and I’ve got some great questions here to put you into this space. When you’re kind of really asking the question how do I it this goal, how can I find these clients, or how can I find this business, how can I lose the weight, what would a person – I’ve already mentioned, I kind of sneaked into this phase of it – what would a person that had already attained this goal do? And that really helps us step over the unknown. It helps us stay brave and it helps us to really create new solutions to keep moving forward.
If you’re feeling like you’re not moving fast enough – I’m a fast start. I hate waiting. So this question got me when I was being coached; are you willing to do what it takes for as long as it takes to get to your goal? When I said yes, I started calming down. I started tapping my inner wisdom and actually things are moving faster in my business than they ever have.
Hitting new and lasting goals in our lives are not easy, but utilizing a powerful believing in yourself mindset is absolutely key. Remember, it’s going to take courage to fully commit to something you’ve not done before. But if failure were not an option, what would you be doing? Also, it will take a lot of awareness of the obstacle thinking that goes on for you.
You’re going to think at first that these are reasons if you’ve not done this thought work, but just note those reasons that you’re not achieving your goal and see them for what they are; just a thought that creates a result you don’t want.
Choose differently by asking your brain how to solve it, what can I do now? Last but not least, if you’re willing to drop your expectations of what it should look like and how long it will take by asking these questions – if I had already achieved this goal, what would I do? If I’m fully committed to this goal, until I see the result, what would I be doing now?
I am learning this in my life right now. I set the goal in January to double the downloads on my podcast. I didn’t know how. I loved what I was doing. I loved what I was bringing you, but I wanted to get this to more people. And they are just about to double for April. And I’m recording this ahead, so we’ll know my then. In my next few podcasts, I’ll let you know, but I am about to double this versus January.
Done, okay, so my next goal is next 90 days, double it again, and even faster. But you know what’s fascinating? I wanted that goal to double every month and it took three months. But what I really know is I’ve created some beautiful momentum and gotten really creative about what I want to do next and the people I want to interview that just creates a beautiful energy here. It’s going to happen.
But I had to get patient and decide to do it until it happened. And that worked. For me this year, I’ve been on a journey which I’ve shared with you a little bit of looking at sugar, flour, and wine in my diet. I decided many of my fellow coaches have really gone on a track, the journey I’ll call it, of no sugar, no flour, and for me, no wine.
I could see that it just might make me feel better. Once I was fully committed, my brain stopped fussing. And I’ve lost five pounds this year. That was one of my goals. But I also set that goal deciding I was going to just get really curious about what was working for me at a new level.
I lost weight in my brain, people. It’s the first time I’ve ever done it without effort and drama. And I really did it by paying deep attention to what was going on in my body, and then decided fully 100% to do no sugar and no flour.
Now, I had a lot of obstacle thoughts and drama along the way. I thought I couldn’t do it going out with girlfriends at night, but the more I just decided and looked for creative alternatives, it happened. And this is the way I do life. I’m just a person who doesn’t drink wine. It’s fascinating.
I had one listener, and I’m just going to say hey to my neighbor Mary here that I talk about wine a lot. Well, for you, it might be something else. You know, there’s something that you just don’t think you can cut out of your diet, but you might have a hunch you can. This is exactly the place to put this 100% all in energy. It really works.
Our brain will bring up a lot of drama or obstacles, unintentional thinking, along the way, but once we keep moving forward and stay committed, it drops. It stops nagging at us.
Alright, last but not least, I set a huge financial goal in my business this year and what I realized is I was avoiding being coached on all my obstacle thinking. And I was still coasting along really doing business the same way. But now, last week, I think I was coached five hours. I just took every opportunity in all these different communities and in my own time to just look at my thoughts, look at the reasons I wasn’t doing something.
Whoa, I feel so much better and I really know I am going to hit my goals. What is so fabulous is this actually gives me more energy. Remember how we started this podcast? I know that so many of you have really talked yourself into believing that setting another goal in your life or by focusing on your wellness, even focusing on your mindset is just going to take too much time, you’re way too busy.
But by doing life this way, by being brave, by looking at all the unintentional thinking, by really getting patient and sitting back and taking action until, I am energized. It does not wear me out to be fully committed. I thought it did.
It was wearing me out to judge myself for all the times I stopped and started. Judgment is an energy suck, so if you can do anything going forward, it’s to stay really curious and notice where you’re judging yourself too harshly. It will not give you great results.
So, if there is an area in your life of wellness or an area in your business that’s just wearing you out, this is the time to put your energy or full commitment to it and apply every single step. Get brave on deciding what you want in the future. Get curious and stop judging how it should look and put your full commitment into it. It is the most energizing and freeing thing you’ll do.
I can’t wait to hear about your goals and what you’re doing in your life. Be in touch. And if you’d like support, you know where I am, dianamurphycoaching.com.
Now, if you’re still here and really ant support, I have a Lose Your First Five Pounds video series. It’s at the bottom of my first page. You just click, put your email in there, and you will get all the emails that will teach you in videos and sending you to different podcasts, if you’re not into watching videos. It will give you a stepwise process to lose your first five pounds.
And what I know is if you lose your first five pounds, you can lose your next. Apply this to any goal in your life and I actually am dreaming up some new videos, so watch for those coming. Have a great day and thanks so much for being a listener. Don’t keep it a secret and have a great day.
Thank you for listening to this episode of Weight Loss for CEOs. If you enjoyed this episode and want more, visit dianamurphycoaching.com for Diana’s latest free coaching tools to get started losing weight without having to start a diet now.